Saturday, November 27, 2010

Metamorphosis (Part II)

The car turned into the gate; she stared at the shimmering canopy of lights. She could hear the loud thumping music at a distance and feel the festive joy in the air. She did NOT want to be there. She was all dressed up in her green salwar, an emerald choker around her neck. She pushed her hair off her brow and tucked it behind her ear and touched the emerald earrings that adorned them- her grandmother's.

The car came to a halt in front of a huge archway made of white roses. She stepped out into this temporary phase of razzle-dazzle, dreading every minute of the fake smiles and hugs and the meaningless small talk that was to ensue. The music got louder with every step that she took, she took a deep breath and kept walking..

She stepped on the stage with her mother, to go and wish the bride and groom and stood for the customary picture when suddenly a laugh distracted her. She looked to see where the sound had come from and that is when she saw him. Dressed in a white kurta, with the sleeves rolled up, hands in his pocket, talking to an elderly woman and charming her with his dimpled smile. She wondered who he was. 'Thank you!', the photographer called out. She hugged the bride again and followed her mother off the stage.

Having unwillingly completed the ordeal of exchanging the usual pleasantries, she excused herself and walked out of the hall, away from the high-pitched laughter, away from those ridiculous air-kisses and away from the plastic smiles. The sound of the sea was something she had always loved, she listened intently ignoring the din from the party. She spotted a vacant swing and decided to sit there a while. The salty breeze blew gently on her face as she dug her feet deeper into the sand. She finally felt real again.

Her eyes fixed on the full moon above, she started humming a tune that had been stuck in her head all evenings. Gently swinging back and forth, she thought of the summers she had spent at her grandparent's place, trying out dare devil feats on the swing by the mango tree. Such a long time ago that seemed like.

Naina snapped back into reality.
"Aren't you a little old to be on the swing?"
She frowned. "I'm sorry, I didn't know there was an age limit", she said sarcastically as she slipped her shoes back on.
"Ha ha ha oh god, I was just kidding you know."
"Never mind, I had to go anyway". She adjusted her drape and looked up.
Her skin, glowing under the moonlight and the breeze moving through her hair, her surreal beauty left him speechless.She turned around to walk away, back towards the party.
"Hey hey I'm sorry, did you take offence?"
She turned back, " Don't worry about it."
He raced up ahead of her. "Oi, listen, I was kidding yaar."
Naina smiled. "I know. And it's ok. Yaar."
"Those are really pretty earrings by the way."
"Ummm I'm Rithvik."
"Nice meeting you Rithvik."
She walked away, and he watched on, listening to the clinking of her bangles. He slapped the back of his head. "Douchebag," he said to himself.

Her mom was still busy talking when she stepped back into the hall, she decided to just show her face and walk away before she got stuck in the pretencious talk again. All the 'kids' her age were on the dance floor  in the basement. She decided to go have a look, atleast that would be better than listening to old ladies gossip. Soon she was also swaying and shaking to the latest 'bollywood' songs with a group of girls her age whom she had just befriended.Jumping and dancing to the beats, she let her dislike for her dad's family go. She was finally having fun.

"Sajna ji vaari vaari....."

"I'm so so sorry, I didn't mean to do that".
She had stepped on someone's foot, she looked up to see who it was.
"Haha, no worries yaar. My punishment for the earlier comment."
" I really am very sorry, are you ok?"
"Well, you're wearing what looks like a 4 inch long pencil heel, what do you think?", he pointed at his toes and wiggled them.
Naina smiled.
"Why did you stop? Dance no", he pulled her hand and dragged her into the crowd again.

He was studying to be a doctor,he loved his bike and his two dogs and he would not shut up. She laughed at his silly stories as they continued dancing. She'd forgotten when she had had so much fun.

Thursday, July 15, 2010

Metamorphosis (Part I)

The rolling of the sea waves is said to be one of the most relaxing sounds, and yet every time a wave hits the sandy shore, it echoes voices from the past. With every receding wave, I seem to be pulled into the dark closet of memories. They say when you look at a full moon, you see the face of the one you love and yet somehow no matter how much i gaze, the moon too disappoints me.. Even mother nature seems to be punishing me for the change..

As I walk across the study to replace a book, i glance at the reflection in the mirror. The silver grey strands that fell over her shoulders and unto her knees. The once bronze toned skin which shone in the summer sun, now pale, translucent and almost lifeless. Her oval face now lined with wrinkles hardly resembled the face that had made hundreds of men catch their breath. Those ruby lips now thin trembling lines, and lost, sorrowful hazel eyes..
I almost gasped when I saw her in the mirror, I stepped closer to the ivory frame to have a closer look at the reflection..
A pale trembling hand stretching out to me,I looked up, our eyes met..

Monday, April 12, 2010


I open the door to fetch the paper in the morning and i notice that they're already there.. As usual, sitting in the corner near the staircase. They look up when they see me and fall silent. I interrupted their gossiping session yet again..They continue giving me those hostile stares until i walk away..Thats just the first encounter for the day...

There're always snooping around.. no matter where i go, they're always there.. it is as though they're spying on me.. it's stupid i try telling myself.. or is it now??

I get done with breakfast and get ready to leave.. Drawing the curtains in the hall i look outside to see if my friend has come, and i see them again.. Peering from the open window.. Their eyes meet mine and they quickly move away.. One of them turns back to check if i'm still looking.. I am.. they move more quickly..

They're most definitely up to something i think but my phone buzzes just in time and i leave..

I've had a long day and the last thing i want is a pesky spy.. I look around.. not a sight of them Whew..

Maybe i'll go for a drive to the beach. I walk towards the car and there they are. A satisfied smirk on their face. Their job is done. Ugh!

I drive away quickly before they can do anything else.. A nice drive ought to relax me..


Ah! the sound of the sea, how peaceful, unlike their constant murmurs.. I pick up food and head home hoping i don't have to see them again at least for the day..

I park the car.. Not sign of them.. I walk up the stairs.. Not the slightest whimper..
I open the door and step in.. AH!! peace!!

I leave the food packet on the table and walk in to my room.. I feel something move behind me. I turn quickly.. Noone..

I shut the door and pull a shirt out of my cupboard.. I hear a murmur.. I step back into the dinning room and quickly turn the lights on.. i notice the open window.. Too late!! They're taken by surprise and come flying at me..


The door bell rings, i open the door. My mother's jaw drops when she sees the ransacked room..
"WHAT on earth happened here?"
" We had visitors", i shrug and point to the window.
"OH GOD!!! The pigeons again!!"

Sunday, March 28, 2010


Ever wondered how many people one meets in one's life? And I mean meet.. like exchanging at least two lines of conversation..

Let's assume I've met 2 new people everyday.. So thats 2 x 365 people in a year..
So in all my life, it should be 20 x 365 x 2 people..
ok ok i know i haven't taken into account leap years, but it's not a mathematical theory that i'm trying to prove here..

What i'm saying is, each one of us happen to meet so many people everyday. But how many of these people do you continue to talk to after that first meeting? How many of them stick on and make a mark in your life? How many of them become a habit?

I've waited all this time
Counting minutes as they pass
Searching for a sign
Wishing for the best
And just when my hopes were wearing thin
You turned my heart to love again

Like a miracle out of the blue
You rescued me like the angels do
You shook the heavens and cracked the sky
When you walked...when you walked into my life

When you appeared
Like sight to the blind
Like music to my ears
Like a reason to a rhyme
And just when I thought my chance was gone
Love came to me with open arms

You search all your life looking for the perfect one, and when you least expect it, they walk into your life and turn your world around..

And hey, it's not just the 'arrow pierces heart' kind of love that i'm talking about here, I mean friends too..

People whom you may have known for quite a while, but never been close to (because of your notions of what you want in a friend) are the ones who end up being closest to for a long long time..
You start seeing things differently, start enjoying every ounce of life and well, 'welcome love with open arms'

Slowly, without you even realizing, they become a part of your routine and going a day without speaking to them just feels so excruciatingly painful!!! Gah!!
I could be a total cliche and say ' I don't have words to pen down how much i love you and how much you mean to me'. But that just isn't me. I believe that man invented language to satisfy his deep need to complain. And that's exactly what i intend to do.. COMPLAIN!!!

I'll come clean, shed my ego and honestly tell you that my day seems incomplete without you.
It feels odd not to see your name flash on my phone at least once everyday. Your stupid smile flashes in front of my eyes, and i miss hearing that familiar voice..
I know I keep pushing you away, but it's only so that you hold me closer.. Ever so often i stay silent when we speak, it's not because i have nothing to say to you, it's because i want you to understand the unsaid.

I'm not the most expressive person on the planet, and i don't say it often enough, but you mean the world to me!

I know people move, times change, but that doesn't mean we should.. and no matter where we are, i want the bond between us to always stay the same..

I can't go any further then this
I want you so badly, it's my biggest wish

I spent my time just thinkin thinkin thinkin bout you
Every single day yes, i'm really missin' missin' you
And all those things we use to use to use to do

Meet me halfway, right at the boarderline
That's where i'm gonna wait, for you
I'll be lookin out, night n'day
Took my heart to the limit, and this is where i'll stay

I'll travel round the world and even sail the seven seas
Across the universe I'll go to other galexies
Just tell me where you want, just tell me where you wanna to meet
I'll navigate myself myself to take me where you'll be
I wanna to have you around like every single day
I love you always..way

(Sigh!!! It does feel good to vent out.. Come Back Already you 'royal' pain.. I Miss you)

Friday, January 15, 2010

We are each our own devil, and we make this world our hell.

They look at me and they know I'm different, they know I'm not one of them and perhaps i never will be..
They love the sun and welcome it with open arms, i cringe away from the blazing sol.. They bring out their silly little umbrella's when the heaven's roar, while i come out from behind the shadows and acknowledge the deluge and 'bask' in the flurry..

They seem to be ignorant to that 'scent'.. That scent that exudes from their skin, from every molecule that makes them, that scent that flows in them and with them, while I can smell it from miles away.. Every time that pungent odour hits me, i feel like 'going for their throat'...

They fumble while carrying the lightest of bags and stare at me as i stride past them with my 30 kg backpack without flinching even once.. They comment about my strength.. Little do they know..

They stare as my eyes glisten in the light, the shade of a smoked topaz perhaps.. They check in the mirror at their own..

They loudly slurp down fish and rice, and wait for me to do the same.. I get quizzical looks as i push my plate away.. Little do they know about my own 'special little diet'

They observe my strong jaw line as compared to their round faces.. My long fingers as compared to their short stumpy appendages.. My sharp distinct features as compared to their stereotypes.. They know i do not belong in their world..

I hear their constant buzzing, somethings they say, some things they don't and i still hear.. I laugh at their 'loud thoughts' and they stare at me again.. Looking at my teeth that are framed by my scarlet lips, they gasp as the light twinkles off the tip of my canines..

They wonder who i am.. They wonder why i'm different..
They look, they stare,
to themselves my features they compare..
They think, they ponder
and still look back with wonder..
they'll never solve the mystery that is me..
I am neither good, nor bad, neither angel nor devil, I am a man, I am a vampire.
(Ok ok i'm not a vampire, but i do feel like one with the weird looks i get every time i'm back 'home'.. I don't look like them, neither do i speak like them and this irritates them... They keep trying to figure me out as i switch my speech from one language to the other, from one accent to the next.. I can't stand eating fish and i'm not a big fan of rice, but what i do like is confusing those several people who stare at me and wonder where i came from, Being an enigma can be fun..Being a fraud mallu can be fun )